Celebrate the Little Victories


Hello lovely readers.

I feel like we have bond of sorts, non?

MAY I ask y’all a question?

…all pun intended there.

How are you guys? Amazing I hope?

I’m good…could be better but i’m good either way.

So how are your Maydays coming along? Are we checking what we’re eating? Or have we abandoned ship already. I’m snacking on a slice of banana bread(read cake) and a mug of apple cinnamon infusion as I type this…ps. there’s a cheddar chicken bacon sandwich calling my name once lunch rolls around. Surprisingly, I’m always eating in the office. My workmates have come to realize that I’ll always have a snack in my bag…an apple, peanuts, cashews, chevda…I’ve got the stash. And then I bought the kettle,,,so it’s all about that apple cinnamon tea whenever the desire hits.

Anywho, that’s not the point of this one.

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THE LITTLE THINGS:

When you’re a perfectionist / have slight OCD like myself, it’s all or nothing. If something doesn’t come to pass the way I envisioned it, it’s a fail really, in my eyes though.

So here’s people calling me and telling me that I’ve done a good job and in my mind I’m thinking, it could have gone so much better than this. Remember that post about being your own worst enemy? Well, it’s a hard habit to kick.

Why would you celebrate the little victories when you can await the so-called big deals?

Go big or go home. But what if the bigger victories are slightly further off?

You’re about to have bacon? Are you going to get worked up over not having steak or are you going to be excited and throw a mini bacon party?

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It’s the small wins that pave way for the bigger victories. (with reference to the bacon  and steak example)

Celebrate Good Times Come On!!…*breaks out a dance move, pops hip,,,sits down and taps foot against floor*

My mom tends to insist that you need to appreciate the little things before you’re capable of getting the bigger deals.

It makes sense in a way actually.

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So guys, do celebrate the smaller doses of good tidings. It’s all about recognizing how far you’ve come from when you started out.

On the random days that I walk home from work,,,you should see me timing myself…10 minutes from points A-to-B, 15 minutes to junction-C, 10 minute power-walk from junction-C to the estate-D, 2 minute half walk-half sprint to the house-E. All timed using the music on my playlist… One time I did all this in 7 songs(p.s that’s about 28 minutes)…I could feel the fitness dreams budding me…then I bought a packet of masala fries and that was that. I celebrated with food. :p

If the big things in life tend to disappoint you, why not turn to all the less consequential goings-on instead?

Take the measure of the small stuff, and string all those little joys together to create your own little corner of good vibes.

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WHY CELEBRATE THE SMALL THINGS?

1. Your mood goes all the way up.

It’s such a boost to your current mood. To recognize that you’re a step ahead of where you were yesterday.

2. Your self-esteem tends to be impacted on positively.

We all know what happens to ourselves(mind…remember the four dimensions of the self from the last post) when we are constantly put down yeah? So why not believe in the opposite but to limit it so that it doesn’t reach out to the extremes i.e. You having a big ego(am I the only one who sang that in tune with Beyonce??)

3. You get motivated to carry on.

When you pat yourself on the back at the end of each step or stride you make, you tend to believe that your goal is now within your reach and you are now at liberty to go for it some more.

4. You deserve it.

Well, you put in the work, lost a couple hairs from your head, missed a couple hours decade of sleep, so now that you’ve come to the rewards part, go crazy. You did the crime, so take the time….pretty sure that’s not how that goes but hey! I’m celebrating here and you can’t tell me nothing.

5. Just because.

I know, this isn’t too valid…much like the “Because I said so” but hey, why give reasons when you want to feel accomplished.

P.s this has had me jamming in the office since yesterday….woohooooo!!!!!

There’s a party goin’ on right here
A celebration to last throughout the years
So bring your good times and your laughter too
We gonna celebrate your party with you

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(notice the cupcake photo…thanks google, you read my expectations and came through pretty spot on)

From a cool corner of Nairobi,

with love, positive vibes and victory cupcakes galore,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

What You Feed Yourself


Hello my lovelies.

I hope you’re all amazeballs and if you aren’t, get yourself a cupcake, pat yourself on the back and say “I’m doing a good job”.

I, on the other hand, am over the moon. You know those things that you never think could affect you but once the hurdle has passed, you feel as though your load is ten times lighter? Well, I’m there. Clearly, I’m behind on this results bandwagon non? Guys checked theirs a couple of weeks back but due to me never having time or maybe I was stalling, I’ve only just checked for them online.

Shall we do this final year and show them how it’s done then? (P.s yes, I survived). You know you’re in Varsity when the instead of doing well, you state that “You’re Surviving”.

So that’s what’s up folks.

Onward;

This has been sitting in my “maybe” pile for a couple of weeks now but I figured its time had come.

WHAT DO YOU FEED YOURSELF?

Have I talked about this before?

Well, if I have, it probably revolved around something completely different from what I’ll spill on this post.

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1. Yourself = Your Body

(p.s. listen to Micasa- Your Body)

What do you eat?

As I write this, i’m snacking on an Avocado, tomato, cheese and ham sandwich, sipping on some lemon-orange infused water.

***Disclaimer***

I’m not about to tell you to do healthy things or start gyming today.

I’m simply being aware of the things that I ingest my system…Granted that I bake enough cakes and pastry to feed a small village.

There’s certain things that you eat and afterwards you wonder whether your brain will really function afterwards…Ugali does it for me…One serving and my brain shuts off…seeing only sleep in its path. If you want to be active, I think you should know by now just what keeps your brain juice going right?

My sister eliminated wheat from her diet…I’m sorry, I can’t do that. Not when my love for chapati and pastry reigns supreme. She’s a tough one that’s for sure.

There’s certain things you consume and if your warning signals light up…maybe it’s not such a good idea then?

I’d go into drinks and beverages but alas….this is not one of those fitness pages…YET. *Kidding….not really but kidding)

2. Yourself = Your Mind

This is more like it.

I keep reiterating that I’m a Positive Vibes enthusiast.

I’ve come into so many amazing results simply because I told my mind that every little thing, is gonna be alright(Hey Nesta).

If your mind is filled with positivity, and your being is  surrounded with positive energy, then there’s no other reason for unnecessary disappointments. Granted that God is playing a role in your life, then I think you’re good to go.

Stop with the negative thinking guys, because only negative things will sprout from that.

What thoughts do you let flow through your mind space?

Do you constantly look to another’s destruction?

Do you loathe another’s success or well being?

Do you want another’s downfall?

What do you put in your mind?

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3. Yourself = Your Heart

Do you know what pumps into your veins? I know we may or may not remember the little biology about oxygenated and….well let’s skip the recap.

Do you feel love for a being because you are loved?

You know you can only dish out what you receive,,,give out what you get, receive only that which you dish out.

So does your heart give off the kind of vibes that you want to receive or have been receiving.

I’m pretty sure you’ve seen a couple of people who put up a certain facade and after a while when the real them turns up, you wonder what on earth is happening. Well, that’s because at one point or another, the facade gets too difficult to hold up; the facade fades.

So what do you feed your heart? A boatload of positive emotions I should hope.

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4. Yourself = Your Soul

As a christian, I genuinely believe that God exists and he’s the owner of my soul. There’s always a desire to be better than your brain can quantify, to live for a being greater than yourself.

So my soul is a big deal. If there is an afterlife, then how do I want to spend it? See, you can only take care of your afterlife in the present life. What steps are you taking to ensure that your soul is intact/in good enough condition for the time when you’re returning it to sender?

Regardless of what deity you worship, you believe that there’s a greater meaning to life than simply surviving here on earth.

Am I that cheesy blogger that’s overselling this positive vibes shenanigans?

If you think so then do let me know and I’ll see how to handle that.

Otherwise,

***Ugali – A maize-meal dish we have in Kenya that’s a bit like the Nigerain fufu for all my non-locals ***

That’s all from yours truly.

Here’s a cupcake because i’m all about what I feed myself.

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From a cool corner of Nairobi,

with love, positive vibes and cupcakes galore,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

What makes you tick?


Olla my lovelies.

As always, i’m late at this…blame it on writer’s block…or it’s because anything I’ve put down the last couple of tries didn’t have enough soul to it.

I’m a perfectionist or I have slight OCD…so if something doesn’t look right…and it’s the work of my hands then I don’t feel it proper to share with anyone else. Like when my cupcakes backfire, i’ll bake more until I get the perfect batch for selling…well,,,perfect in my eyes.

I’m one of those guys that would probably go back and correct an assignment…long after I handed it in and received my grade. It’s a good and yet bad thing but such is life I suppose. C’est ma vie,,,et ma vie est belle.

Oooh…where are my manners? How are y’all? Good Awesome Amazing Extraordinarily Enjoying life? I do hope so.

Well, Writer’s Block? Bye Felicia.

My better half conscience constantly reminds me to upload content on the blog. So here we are now…finally figured out what to write.

WHAT MAKES YOU TICK?

Not as impersonal as you think....here's my wrist guys

Not as impersonal as you think….here’s my wrist guys

Tick? No not that blood sucking pest( which reminds me…do you remember that PowerPuff Girls episode that had that weird thought-sucking villain?)

But yes, tick.

To tick…if taken literally based on the workings of a clock…means to move.

So my content is mostly going to be based on trying to figure out what makes people to be moved to do something, to reach out, to strive to succeed…to live.

I asked this to le workmates recently and seeing as they are IT people,,,few words were exchanged. But I generally figured out what made them choose to code and deal with software, hardware and technology.

One said,

“I want to fix things. I figured that seeing as I can’t fix people, then i’d rather fix something non-living. If I can sit down for hours taking apart and putting together a computer, over and over, I cultivate my skills of being patient enough to deal with people.”

The other one said,

“I like challenges. If I work on something that won’t cause my hands to get clammy or my thoughts to go on overdrive…why should I do it? I do it because it’s proven to be an interesting challenge.”

 

When you surround yourself with people who know what drives them, don’t you get inspired to express your own driving factor?

 

They say passion is the greatest driver of them all.

He drives with such elegance and intensity that it’s pretty difficult to ignore his bulky frame when he steps into your thoughts. He takes charge where it matters and takes you to the edge…(yes, we’re still talking about Passion).

passion

so ticks huh?

 

– Am I comfortable with what I am doing?

This doesn’t necessarily always mean settling for less…or giving up on striving for something because an easier option came up. It’s basically about finding an interest in the path you’ve chosen. So Are you comfortable with what you’re doing?

 

What are your short term goals? 

  What are your long-term goals?

– How much could I have?

What is your end after all the work and struggle?

Is it your degree?

Is it the amount of money in your account? If yes, then in order to get to those 10 digit balances, how much work are you willing to put in and without giving up the second things start looking up for you?

If it’s in the pursuance of your dreams…are you willing to put your life on hold albeit for a little while to see it through? You suddenly keep getting free tickets to stuff and networking events just a few weeks before a deadline…would you attend?

Allow yourself to dream about how much you could have, decide whether you are ready to have that and then go for it.

in the end

– What motivates you?

Umm…Kelly Rowland is not an appropriate answer here.

As a human being, there’s always a million and one things running through our minds at any given moment.

Let’s do this…as you read this, think about something that happened that awakened a need to do something or follow through to the end…

Think about it and how it got your brain juice flowing. > Remember the post about dreams? <

And then, think about something else that made you feel like quitting just as soon as you started…What about it put you off that much?

There’s a drive, a tick that was there in the motivated one that is missing in the other scenario, yeah? If you could figure that out and tap into that potential…would you? If you found out that yeah, this emotion or this item makes me want to achieve something,,,you would grab it and never let it go I assume.

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– Have I done enough for myself?

Ok…this is almost starting to look like some self-help blog, non?……..back to the question at hand.

I’m a huge advocate for discovering what makes you feel discontent.

  • Figure out what leaves your successful leap not seem as amazing as you would have liked.
  • Discover that which makes you yearn for something else.
  • If you could do something more than is expected of you, would you?

I have mild OCD of sorts therefore, it’s very difficult to sit back and be completely satisfied with the things I give out. (As I pointed out in the beginning of this piece) With this great power comes great responsibility. The desire to be discontent with everything I do or feel…it’s great you know.

To reach past that self-disapproval and accept my own creations…it’s a challenge that I’m not sure I’m willing to overcome.

 

Last Question:(Surprise,,,i’m a woman human and we always have a lot of questions to ask given the chance)

– What really makes you tick?

You need to know what you want to do in order to properly respond to this question.

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So guys, what  makes you tick?

You should think about it, take a second…matter of fact you should take four.

Let’s stop doing things for the mere sake of doing them but let’s do them because we really crave the achievement.

respo

 

From a cool corner of Nairobi,

with dreams, and desires and cupcakes galore,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

 

Mindspeak


Olla muchachos. :) :)
You’re doing well i should hope? still basking in The Afterglow non?

Awesome.

I should be studying but look where I am…tihihi.

Figured the blog needed a little loving…

So, what better way to appreciate my brain child than with recognition?

I was nominated by one of the coolest and sweetest poets i’ve come across just yet. Her name’s Meg from Dream Chasing: The Revelations and she’s such a barbie doll it’s insane.

Anywho, the internet apparently wants us to appreciate female bloggers outchea(Female bloggers stand up!) and it came up with the Sisterhood of the Bloggers award.

So in honour of this(Momma we made it), I’m supposed to answer a few questions to the best of my abilities and understanding….and in full honesty.

BUT First lemme take a selfie lemme nominate a couple sweethearts and dimes whose blogs i just so happen to follow:

– Mal Kanini(There’s two cool ladies behind this one btw) of Heels, Hearts and Heroine

– Barbie Abwoga of The C-Word| No not contraception, cancer

– Michelle Nyakiamo of When Life Changes

– Nyambura Murigi of Wake Up and Smell the Coffee

– Gathoni of Pickles in Jars

– Wangechi of justwangechi’s blog

p.s as you can probably tell, there’s so much to how you name your blog that draws in readers and allows you their guaranteed loyalty. :) check these examples of good bloggership and know why they’re currently bookmarked on my browser. We’re all amateur writers but alas, our fingers can put down into writing what our minds try to project.

p.p.s To the Lovely bloggers nominated, copy paste the questions and answer them in your own point of view. Tag the blog so I get to read them as well.

Back to the situation:

If you could be any animal, what would you be and why?

Haaah! Because as a human being i’m not already an animal?(Dear Biology, did you lie to me? ) Anywho, I’d pick an eagle. I love how strong and independent they seem. I’d have wings to fly around and see the world from way up there…i’ve been down here for so long it would be nice to discover the true birds eye view. An eagle embodies strength and resilience(at least to me).

Plus, have you seen how gorgeous an eagles face and beak structure is?

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What legacy would you like to leave behind?

That’s a good question. (Beyonce fans in the house say what!) Legacy? well, something that I’ll leave behind because the life that I live will someday have to be returned to sender? Ok. see how pretty difficult this is to answer? As I beat around the bush…call me George…might be from Georgia haha. I would really love to leave my positivity behind. The memory of my thoughts and words should spread and let it be known that there was a girl that wanted to dispell the negativity that surrounds every nook and cranny of this world that we live in; to try and bring in as much positive thought and action; that though may be unknown to many, imparted some warmth into their hearts and minds.

Name one thing you love about yourself, why?

One thing only? Sigh. Such vain beings we are. I love love love love love my mind. I’m not a materialistic person per say, I can’t say that I love my body because it’s prone to change; I can’t lay a claim on my face or anything of that sort because of the same reason. But my mind. It’s a wormhole that even I at times find difficult to understand. In this mind, I’ve build an entire empire; that has my goals, desires, weaknesses and strengths all panned out. In this very mind, my dreams are conjured and from the last blog post(it’ll be ours) you know why dreams are important and are ever so valid.

What would you like to change about yourself or improve on?

My perception of myself. Once again, it trickles down to my mind. This very mind that knows all my strengths, also knows all my so-called weaknesses. If I could put a lid on the negativity that involves talking down to myself or ultimate disapproval. But to each his own I suppose. I try get around this anyway because it’s such a pebble in a field of rock.

If you could fly for a day, where would you go?

To the one who undoubtedly holds my heart. If I could, I would. But seeing as that’s slightly far fetched and mysterious, i’ll settle for Morocco. My dad has told me stories about how amazing their culture is, how welcoming they are generally, the FOOD, the breathtaking beauty that is Marakech, full of life, colour and pompadour. I would really travel here in a nano-second if travelling were free.

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If you could have supernatural abilities what would it/they be?

Supernatural lovers I see you. :)

I would once have said mind reading but I realised that there’s a certain peace of mind that comes with not knowing people’s thoughts all the time.

Now, I would really want to have the power to be a medium. There’s so many people I know that would simply love to have a link to someone who’s passed; to tell them “hey. I miss you” or “I’ve been doing this with the aim of making you proud, am i getting there” or simply to feel as alive as they once did when that person was roaming the earth among us. Now that’s my superpower.

Where would you like to live? Why?

I would like to live where the weather is always perfect. Not too much rain, nor too much Sunshine. A place where my heart is content and I can call home. But in reality, take me to Marakech OR Trinidad and Tobago(thank you Nicki Minaj for this insight into Trini…)

If you could meet anyone, who would it be? {past, present, future}

[past]My mum and dad when they were younger. The love they still show all these years later makes me want to have met them before it got this far, to see how amazing they were at living…to laugh at my dad’s fro an ‘stache and glasses and steal clothes from my mum’s wardrobe.

[present] My nephew. I miss Nate. :( :( but besides that, it would be awesome to meet Brad Lau aka ladyironchef (http://www.ladyironchef.com/) because he does travel and food so well.

[future] My 35 year old self…so she can tell me that it’ll turn out fine. That these struggles aren’t in vain.

Why do you blog?

I blog because I want to leave a digital footprint that I’ll come back to when I’m older to simply remember. For my kids to discover and finally agree that I indeed was cool “back then”. Besides, all these thoughts need to be written down somewhere so why not share it with the world; the known and the unknown.

Would you consider yourself happy?

Happiness is such a fleeting emotion. It cannot be measured as you would measure the amount of sugar you need for a batch of cupcakes(hint hint). There are moments when I can agree that I am happy. For now, we can agree that i’m simply satisfied with what life is offering and the steps i’m taking. Satisfaction is pretty a kin to happiness.

Talk about straight from the heart answers huh? Now you’ve had a glimpse into the mind that is mine. I’ll see y’all soon. I can study now.

Happy third Birthday Blog…I’m five days late but I had to make it big. :) I can’t believe it’s been three whole years though. THREE years…that’s 36 months, 1095 days, 26280 hours, 1576800 minutes, 9460800 seconds…

to me

To more years of writing out my mindspeak for you my amazing readers.

From a cool corner of Nairobi,

with dreams, and desires and cupcakes galore,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

It’ll be ours:


Hello lovelies.

I’m here…come back please?

Where have I been? School and then some, and baking cupcakes…p.s. they’re the best you’re yet to have. *blows own horn*

That aside,

I missed your precious*insert gollum’s voice here…my precioussss* souls. I honestly hope that you’re amazing.

dream-catcher-tattoos--large-msg-136555998016

Have you had a dream or a vision of something you want to achieve or have or see?

Have you ever thought about what life would be like if the universe set out all your ideals before you?

Have you ever imagined just where you’d be if your wishes were fulfilled?

What life would be like if you never had to struggle?

If your thoughts were never in disarray?

Your desires were satiated and you needed nothing?

Well, I have.

You may say i’m a dreamer.

A creative? Maybe.

But haven’t you also wondered what it would be if you didn’t have to struggle?

If love come to you as easily as the words “mama” and “papa” to a child?

Would you be happy then?

I don’t think so. I know you won’t be happy.

You see, We’re designed to always search for more,

Hunt for the deeper forms of satisfaction.

Desire to share in the world that is ultimate happiness.

Feel incomplete the further we get away from our ultimate end;

But don’t get me started on how amazing it feels to take that step in the right direction.

You may say i’m a dreamer.

My dreams are a painting.

I’m hard at work all night to achieve the greater success that my heart yearns for.

The material(things) is good yes, because I need to survive.

But what is to survive if you’re not really alive?

Alive? You’ll insist that your heart is beating innit?

And to that i’ll pull out your seat, get on it and have a listen.

You may say i’m a dreamer,

Thankfully I know now that the heart beat doesn’t really mean i’m alive.

It means that i’m responsive, my body functions okay.

Hell, i’m even breathing in the right way.

Today,

But it’s still doesn’t mean i’m alive.

So here’s a couple of diamonds in the rough,

To be alive it means;

//To have a genuine smile on your precious face;

To be alive it seems;

//You have to love in an innocent way;

To be alive not in dreams;

//You take the chances that even after trying you could never ace.

To be alive, the world deems…

It fit  : to mean not surviving,

            : to mean not going through the motions and expecting a different outcome,

            : to desire to live beyond the now and the current,

            : to chase your dreams above and beyond.

So are you living or are you alive?

Dreams

Somewhere in the dream we had an epiphany
Now we right the wrongs in history
No one can win the war individually
It takes the wisdom of the elders and young people’s energy
Welcome to the story we call victory

(Isn’t this jam such a motivating piece of awesome collaboration? Get’s your blood pumping, with patriotism, with a sense of belonging, with a new found belief in you dreams.)

p.s. If you click on the “dreamer” that’s highlighted, a couple of interesting lyrical surprises might pop up.

From a cool little corner of Nairobi,

With love and life and #PositiveVibes,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

Growth


Hello darlings.

How are you? third week into the year treating you good, i hope?

Figured I’d give you guys a little something out of my thinking box.

You know how you say certain things and then realize about a year ago(hahahaha), well, “I wouldn’t have even dared utter such atrocities”.

Back then, it seemed as though you would never have gotten to the level at which you currently are in.

As usual, I love doing evaluations; both of self and of the people I interact with.

So  I did a self-study.

I decided that like the observer I tend to be most times, I would sit back and take note of any key changes in my circle and its surrounding halo.

You know they say that to grow you need to live.

Again, don’t ask me who said these things…I’d obviously just chalk it up to the “Wahenga na Wahenguzi ambao hawakuchana nywele zao na mifupa ya samaki waliposema….” *Inshas were my forte though…those primary school 38/40s and high school 25/30s…*

>>loosely translate that to mean “The wisemen didn’t comb their hair with fishbones for nothing when they said….”<<<

I digress. Is this a habit? If it is, i’m sorry…not sorry.

Back to the point.

Growth.

julia cameron

We go through life holding onto the negative emotions from past experiences. We deal with things now with the notion that if something happens then you’ll be pushed back into that state of worthlessness that you were trapped in, in the past. You can’t go through life tied down to the past. I know it’s said that your past shows your character but to be honest that has no link to your now and your future.

Your past is simply that, your past. No-one can control the past because time moves, life goes on. So if life goes on, who are you to defy the universe when it blatantly offers up a blank slate with each new day? In what capacity are you to insist that a past mistake, a past hurt, a past relationship, will define your today and your thereafter? I believe in the desire to use the past to measure where you are at the moment. I really do. However, most of us tend to focus on a negative aspect.

I’m a jaded lover. With a “history” of interesting lovers and friends, one could easily say that I’m incapable of normal. I learnt to let go of the hold I’d willingly given to my past. That supposed hurt I associated with certain people or certain things, that anger that I tied to something. My excuses. My excuses were immeasurable and innumerable. I realized that I associated certain emotions with past experiences.

So guess what? I learned to let go.

How? I told the universe that I don’t need that energy in my mind. I don’t need that link between things that bring up such negative emotions.

I desired to cut ties…with all the lies that I’d been living in(if you don’t where this is from then i don’t know what music you listen to).

I concluded that I’m above my emotions. I control them not vice versa.

First step, forgive yourself. I realized that I berated myself majority of the time. I was my own Debby-downer. I was my own wet blanket. So I forgave myself for being so unfair to myself.

***

On this note, isn’t this song so fitting?

Faith- CALVIN HARRIS.

I need a little space in my mind,

I need that little hope I can find;

I need to feel my soul come alive,

I need to feel the strength to get by,

I need a little faith.

***

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Next, make amends and distance yourself. The way a doctor would insist that you shouldn’t pick at a scab until it completely heals over. I did this until I was confident enough in my own brain’s ability to not revert back to the previous state.  I took a step back from basically all the relationships…friendships, that is, that I had. I took a step back to reevaluate them. Sifted out the unnecessary and I’m proceeding to mend the ones I clearly want to have.

Thirdly, positive vibes.

I spread these like wildfire to be honest. If it wasn’t in the simple complement of people appearance, it was of the fact that I noted people’s auras more. There’s those that illuminate their surroundings and those that suck out the colour from theirs. I accept compliments. (Which reminds me; someone asked me why I like compliments so much. I realized that if you like how something is, why not pay it tribute of sorts? If a flower smells divine, then won’t you speak your mind about it? If someone seems to have put in the effort, why not appreciate it? ) You’ll never be truly happy if you focus only on yourself.

greatAnd lastly, live.

Survival was my thing. Possibly still is, in the right situation though. I went through the motions. Eat, survive, sleep, repeat. I decided one day to open my eyes to what really happens around me and I haven’t looked back since.

Experience new things. Get out of your cocoon / bubble. Mingle. Share. Love. Experience. Cry. LIVE ALREADY.

Life is such a questionable irreplaceable gift that once you lose it, it’s gone.

Bloody live.

If-others-growing-consider-your-enviroment

It’s not turning into one of those inspirational blogs…but hey, even if it does, your opinion is a menial addition to my thought process.

Appreciate and celebrate growth.

Appreciate and celebrate life.

Are we still basking in The Afterglow like I am?

*images courtesy of google.com*

(p.s. it’s almost February…some major hints being poured here)

From a cool little corner of Nairobi,

With love and life and #PositiveVibes,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

The Afterglow


The afterglow:

af·ter·glow
ˈaftərˌɡlō/
noun
noun: afterglow; plural noun: afterglows
  1. light or radiance remaining in the sky after the sun has set.
    • good feelings remaining after a pleasurable or successful experience.

Today and over the past weekend a number of people have asked me why I’m happy.

Apparently, it’s a bit of a situation to see me smile or generally just radiate happiness.

I’ll try and pinpoint a couple of reasons.

The title probably says it all.

An afterglow.

The lingering effects of something blissful.

The aftermath of something positively amazing occurring moments prior.

The result…yes that’s the word. The result of something taking place that leaves you in a mood that lights up the heavens and the earth on which you stand.

 

My afterglow stems from Christmas.

Have you ever been surrounded by so much family that you believe for sure that there’s not a doubt about your origin?

Have you ever been surrounded by so many childhood stories of yours and your siblings’ mischief that you longed to relive it?

Have you ever been the brunt of so many embarrassing stories that you turned from red to purple to freaking blue because you laughed so hard at the things you did when you were younger?

Have you ever basked in the glow of satisfaction because you spent time with the people that clearly will never let you down?

Have you ever been so in love with the concept of family that you admire how far the extended family reaches and how amazing it is to meet people who last saw you when you were a toddler?

Yes, I had many of those “Do you remember me? I last saw you when I held your feeding bottle back when you were a couple of months old.” …yeah sure I do.I barely remember my first five years, but ofcourse your face is the one thing I can recall.

and a couple of these too “Ayyy!!! Look at you! You’ve grown! Turning into a fine woman.” …did you expect me to remain a baby…while the years passed by??

And there was this one “What are you doing now? Hey! You’re in University? When? You’re about to clear even? My goodness. I thought you were in primary school.” …well, let’s see here. Ten years ago you made the same comment about my being still being in primary school…I don’t know how growth works for you then.

And my favorite “You’re understanding of the dialect seems to be better. I remember a time when we told you something and you would just reply the simple <<Eeeh!>>, smile awkwardly and hide behind your dad.”

I had a hoard of sarcastic answers to any and every single one of these kinds of remarks…Lord knows how I held my tongue in. Self-discipline for the win!

But back to the Have you evers.

If you’ve experienced these then I’m sure you know the feeling that accompanies it.

Here I am a couple of days later, feeling the effects of such a chill vacation.

You see, I have a knack for appreciating families that stick with each other. More so, families that don’t just live in their shell but have a network with their relatives. Maybe in the future, I might let you in on why I value family and why I want my kids to have the same notion of family as I do. Just not today and on this forum.

oh

So that was the holiday. Save for the insane amounts of slaughtered animals that were consumed. I’m still amazed at how my protein allergies did not act up. Roast meat and any celebration = Happy Kenyans.

I feel like Christmas was actually Christmas.

Silently thanking God for being well you know God.

Thanking Him for the opportunities that he revealed and offered us the past year.

Thanking Him for the gift of family.

Plus I met a couple interesting creatures in the past two weeks. Only way is up from here I suppose. :)

And ..*drum roll*..i’m one year away from graduating. I can finally say next year without it looking too far in the distance *from a distance…no? Okay.* As I slowly reevaluate my GPA goals…ambition is priceless. *Cue Wale-Ambition*

 

My afterglow; it’s going to stretch for a couple more months.

 

Also, guess what month it is?

*whispers January*

And guess what next month is?

*Tihihi…stay tuned for more intel.*

 

Afterglow- Wilkinson

Someone hold the sunlight back,

Cause we want this night to last.

(just put it in this context…shaa!! this is such a tune regardless.)

 

Happy New Year my lovelies.

Happy 2015.

May all the desires that you have written down as resolutions be achieved.

May all the happiness i’ve tried to squeeze into this post be leaked into your eyes through the screen of whatever device you’re reading it from, and proceed to cause your face to morph into a smile.

*a bit creepy yeah? cough. cough. *

From a cool little corner of Nairobi,

With love and life and #PositiveVibes,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

 

One for the books


Hello; Habari ;Bonjour ; Halo ; Hej ; Hallå;

I figured my last post this year(in case the inspiration bug doesn’t bite me again), would be about me taking stock.

Appropriately timed and labelled don’t you think? Seeing as it is the end of a 12 month accounting period…school is still in the system as you can see.

Let’s get on with this show then, shall we?

Making: melodies in my heart room for more shoes on the rack…and plans for a little bit of modification. ;)

Cooking: eh,,,refer to my instagram account for this…although I recently failed at baking cinnamon rolls..(next time my precious). p.s I make mean(why not nice?) oven baked spicy pork chops.

Drinking: a tall glass of wine thanks to the infamous Four Cousins that we know and love…and water. Lemon water, ginger water, strawberry mint water, garlic water(which is good for your blood and flushing out the toxins…not for your breath).

Reading: the Hobbit because I watched the battle of the five armies and I’m totally motivated to relive the story of Bilbo Baggins. can Richard Armitage get it or naah? and include the “Kenyan Fantasy Anthology” from http://willthisbeaproblem.com/2014/12/09/fantasy-and-africans/ ….see guys, I always hardly never read period.

Wasting: a lot of time thinking and rethinking decisions and such trivial matters.

Sewing: a circle skirt in print fabric…hand-stitching is the worst.

Wishing: Is this limited to one wish only? Because I have a long list of things i’m wishing for at the moment; The Note 4 (because how classy is that piece of mobile technology?), a sewing machine (hey, i think i have internal bleeding in one of my fingers because the needle went HAM on it), for more love in a world filled with so much selfishness it’s insane.

Enjoying: This new found desire to bake anything and everything…cakes, cupcakes, bread, pizza, french fries, chicken,,,if it’s bakeable then best believe i’ll bake it).

Liking: ahahah…doesn’t have to be a human being I suppose? so I’m liking my mother’s confidence in my driving skills…taken her six months to get comfortable and sit back without screaming at something that’s not even going to happen…like “Hey!! You can’t see that car.” yet the said car is nearly 50 metres away coming at me at 10kph; or better yet, “Slow Down” yet once again the said gauge is reading that i’m at 30kph.

Wondering: Is it really necessary to keep fixated on things that tie you to the past that in itself is basically non-existent? Just a passive memory that holds nothing more than bitterness and hurt?

Loving: My Millebacci no. 46 from Nakshi Nouba. It’s the truth guys. Such amazing lip colour/lipstick. Such vivid color.

Marveling: at marvel comics  at someone named marvella at how time is a healer and a destroyer at the same time.

Needing: a beach house and a vacation away from any form of civilisation; but more importantly, a better savings plan.

Smelling: of warm vanilla sugar from Bath and Body Works …sigh. this is home guys. This is the scent I always return to after “trying out” all other scents and i love vanilla and icecream from I love cosmetics…that lotion is the truth. See the trend guys? *Dear anybody flying in soon, get me these? thanks. *

Following: Scorpion because what????? nerds and solving crimes and things…hello. hooked!! And it’s a series so it’s long enough.

Noticing:  Mental upgrades. Apparently, I smile more. good thing? I guess my PositiveVibes mantra is working.

Knowing: That life is always full of surprises that put you off your game,,, you just have to get back on your horse and move on.

Thinking: What on earth is my next hairstyle going to be? Woman problems are made of these. :( :( :( :(

Feeling: Loved and Happy.

Bookmarking: sallysbakingaddiction.com on my browser. Never too late to discover something new to bake.

Opening: the business section of the newspaper and general internet space because international finance wants me to…it’s actually pretty interesting.

Giggling: at my dad’s jokes because he is the epitome of insane.
Eating : chicken bacon pizza because no rules during Christmas season… Eat what the heart wants, whenever the heart wants.

Cheerio my doves.
Happy Holidays.
Merry Christmas.
Enjoy the company you’re going to keep over the next few days and spread the vibes of awesome-nicity.

P.s have you listened to Sam Smith’s rendition of Have yourself a merry little Christmas?
If not… Here you go:
Sam Smith – Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas: http://youtu.be/rnEqv8WcVq8

From a cool little corner of Nairobi somewhere on the continent,
With love and life and #positivevibes,
.theafricangirl.
*Mapenzi.Love* :)

Conventional Ways?


Hello, hello, hello.

I figured I’d get this random post over and done with because well I simply have missed rambling on here.

So here goes:

I was watching a movie the other week where the main character, some girl, came under fire from “observers” about how she became friends with a couple of the guys in her life. The classic tale of kiss the frogs and realizing incompatibility or a certain level of friendliness that cannot be ignored. Basically, she kissed a couple of them and now they’re in her circle of friends.

I did a self-evaluation because a couple of bells rang in my mind and because isn’t that what movies conjur? These idle minds of ours that are susceptible to absorbing everything and being convinced that in TWO HOURS: two people can meet at college, fall in love, out of it, date other people, get back together, get married, have kids, watch them grow, get grandkids, travel the world,,,,two hours guys!!!! But that’s the thing about movies innit? They simply show movement; and inadvertently lead to movement of desires, emotions, finances, our thoughts…

Back to the soul-searching. I realised that indeed there are certain people in my life that would not be in it if there was no kiss and friend. Weird, I know? But it’s completely true.

image

Did they work out? Yes, some of them did and a couple that didn’t were simply nipped in the bud because life has enough problems without having to add such trivial matters.

We get so caught up in trying to make friends because “Hey!!! We are social by nature us human beings *Dear Philosophical Anthropology lecturer,,,see I understood this concept* ”  that we use whatever means necessary to get them.

Any means necessary? That’s a tad extreme dontcha think? But it is indeed the reality that we force ourselves to settle for.

Some say “We never kiss and tell” as a means of ignoring something that actually took place. I’m guilty as charged of pulling this one but consequences are there for a reason.

Anywho, What is the standard way of this selection?
image

I’m an intorvert by design, an extrovert to certain people and a massive question mark to everyone else.

Girls? Pretty simple. Why? because we share the same gender and the struggles that come along with it.

Guys? I have to split them into potential suitors, friends and the other question marks. It’s the question marks that leave everyone wary though.

Proper conversation? I don’t think I can have a full length conversation without making a joke(puns) and proceeding to laugh at how amazing my brain can be sometimes.
(Mindy Project anyone??)
Once again my question stands, is there a way of making friends? Is there a school of “friendship” that people get enrolled in? School for the shy…like yours truly?

Dear movies, I’ve seen enough of your lies to know that indeed you’re very unnecessary but watch you I still will. We can all be friends without classifying each other into frogs and princes or princesses, yeah?

Here’s to expanding the circle in more normal subject to societal scrutiny “conventional” ways. No more kiss and friend guys.

From a cool little corner of Nairobi,

with love, life and a multitude of thoughts,

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)

Mentalities


Holla Holla We dem boyz.

Holla Holla; we making noise.

images

Over the past few weeks, our internet has amassed a serious volume and number of disturbing stories. There’s the dress one, the baby being abused by her nanny/maid depending on what vocabulary you use and most recently, the racism one about Michael Brown.

Strip Me Not:

There’s this mentality that people have and are expressing that when you dress up, the clothes on your back are for the people around you. Meaning that, whatever you decide to wear has to be deemed appropriate. I have no qualms about decency; are jeans decent? are vests decent? are midi-dresses(for the male readers these are dresses that fall halfway between the knees and the ankles) The answer to all the above is a simple and unanimous YES!!!

And these are exactly what the victims were dressed in.

There are people out there convinced that the women had it coming. The videos of which i can’t even get past a couple of seconds, bear voices of the perpetrators and crowds screaming “Vua! Vua! Toa yote!” loosely translated to “Undress them! Undress Them! Take it all off!”

To some extent I do agree with the fact that the levels of decency must be respected enough such that when you wear something, you don’t have to feel overly exposed to the atmosphere. But there exists some strain of human beings that believe that women are there to be objects of pleasure and that alone. SO tell me dear readers, will someone with some misplaced and misconstrued mentality really let any female pass them by without lusting after them? It wouldn’t matter if they are adorned in a buibui, long skirt and wrist cuffed shirts, school uniforms, jeans vests, sweaters. Their aim will always be to look for what they want and try to get it by all means.

There was a protest early last week labelled “My Dress My Choice”. I think it was insanely brilliant. Regardless of how many people have asked “So now that they held the protest, now what?” ; or the best one I’ve heard “Why should our fellow men be privy to such nuisances in the name of advocating for women’s rights?”

In life, there’s always the good and the bad; the positives and the negatives.

Ask yourself this though, if you’ve watched the videos(which are insanely explicit) and have seen what those poor defenceless women went through, and HAVE YET TO DO ANYTHING yet you sit behind a screen and expose your ignorance to the internet by asking “so now?” are you any better? really? At least the protesters went out of their merry way to recognize that the dignity of the victims has been stripped off of them(literally) and were in a way trying to restore this dignity by giving them a voice and a platform.

Why should everyone be up in arms? Men included? Because you are from woman.

You have, or had a mother, a wife, a sister, an auntie, a grandmother, a daughter, a niece.

Would you strip them? I know the unanimous answer to this is a resounding NO! But how would you react when you come home to find that there’s a video of your “insert female relative here” was stripped in a public place by a bunch of rowdy men who then also tried to violate her? A video that was sent to your Whatsapp, and is doing the rounds on social media?

Would you lay your hand on another female knowing very well that it could be your “Insert female relative here??”

Isn’t there a better way to deal with the “indecency” as is claimed? Like perhaps and I’m going out on a limb here, covering her up and shipping her to the police station to be booked under indecent exposure?

And it seems that the perpetrators of the strip to teach actions are retaliating against the protest from last week. This new week, more videos have surfaced where women are being fondled after being stripped.

So you, Yes YOU behind that screen that is shaking their head in complete agreement with the perpetrators actions on stripping…are we still having the same mindset?

As I pointed out before, there’s a difference between tradition and whatever mentality people are trying to hide behind today.

It makes sense that we’re in Africa and some shit shouldn’t fly here because we’re cultured but to be honest, there’s nothing about tradition being practised by these “judge-jury and executioner” style men that strip women and consequently take turns to fondle them.

You cannot change the mind and opinion of someone who before they left the house decided that they would, if the scenario arises, willingly strip a woman and fondle her private parts on the guise of tradition.

 

But once again, I’m here behind a screen aren’t I?

I’m pretty sure that I would not know what to do if this happened to me. I cannot begin to empathize with these women because I do not know how it feels to be in their shoes. All I’m doing is sympathizing, pitying and as many of y’all are, thanking the stars that it’s not me.

And in fear and constant suspicion I am living, because even my loosely fitting jeans and my thick woollen sweater aren’t enough reassurance that I will be spared if I were to step out into the city.

Don’t ask the people who are sharing their opinions why they felt the need to do it but instead, come up with your own opinion. Don’t squash others voice because you have nothing better to say. If you have no solution, do not rain on the parade of those who are trying to seek one out. Just sit down, please and thank you.

Where has the society that we once knew disappeared to?

ubun

We talk about Ubuntu but noone wants to mention it in the midst of all this drama.

A child being abused by a nanny.

A young man being shot more than 6 times without any form of defence or any voice.

Dear society,

I know I’m writing to the wrong people but sometimes you need to vent and let it do its rounds on the internet.

Can we revert back to this tradition that we claim to be practising so hard?

If not then can you not turn a blind eye to what is happening around you?

Can we simply not be so quick to point the blame to any party or to judge?

Can we not be so quick to insist on tradition yet the people doing this follow no tradition but some form of “Mutated primal instinct”?

We are not animals so we cannot keep behaving as though we haven’t learnt about morals and cultures. 

Some will insist that this is only happening in the towns and cities like Nairobi and Mombasa but how about the many other unreported cases that take place in the rural areas? Is it still a case of tradition?

But then again, this is my opinion I suppose.

free

In the mean time, take a peek at this article that I came across that is pretty interesting.

Beyond My Dress My Choice

 

Until my next interaction with you lovely souls,

Good health, Positive Vibes.

 

Sincerely yours,

A concerned face behind a screen.

A voice behind a keyboard.

A concerned citizen.

A daughter, sister, niece, granddaughter, auntie and future wife.

.theafricangirl.

*Mapenzi.Love* :)